Picnic By The Motorway

Join me for a sandwich

Category: Uncategorized

A change is as good as a holiday

What do you do when you have some extremely pressing tasks to attend to, but you have no one to answer to (except yourself) regarding said tasks?

You probably just get on and tackle those tasks because you are self-motivated and brilliant. I, however, sit on my butt and decide now is the perfect time to write a blog. I have nothing to write about. Who cares? It is very important that I tippity tappity out an entry right this instant. It is my duty as a blogger to give my loyal readers something to digest at 11.57pm on a Wednesday night. Sure, I need to pack for our first family getaway and I need to write up a holiday meal plan and shopping list so I’m all prepared when I hit the supermarket first thing in the morning, but none of that is as important as writing this for you.

I am procrastinating big time, and you’re my excuse, so please pretend that you really needed to read something from me today so I can feel justified in my – let’s face it – totally unjustifiable  actions.

We’re going to my sister’s bach in the Coromandel for a few days, and while I’m sure we’ll enjoy ourselves once we get there, right now the preparations just seem overwhelming. I think it’s because I’m struggling to see this as a proper break. It feels more like we’ll just be doing the same old stuff but with a different background. My job is being a mum. It’s a 24/7 gig and going to the beach with my boyfriend and son does not mean I get to clock out. In fact, I’m a bit nervous there are some things about being away with Victor that will actually be more difficult than they would be at home.

Getting LV to sleep anywhere but in his own cot has always been a huge challenge. I know, without a doubt, that bedtime and nap times for the first day or two at the bach will involve epic battles between mother and son while father does his best not to get caught in the fray.

The bach isn’t baby-proofed. There are open stairs leading up to a mezzanine. The entire downstairs area (including bedrooms) has terracotta tile flooring. I foresee a lot of injuries in my baby’s near future and I’m fairly certain there isn’t an A&E in the beach town we’re visiting.

If it rains we’re stuffed. We’ll be stuck inside with a bored accident-prone baby and no relatives or friends to foist ourselves upon in an effort to break the monotony.

In the meantime, I have no idea how we’re going to fit the pram, playpen, portacot and its mattress, highchair, a big box of toys, groceries and our actual luggage in the car. Especially with his massive flippin’ carseat taking up such valuable tetris-packing real estate.

YAY YOU GUYS I’M GOING ON HOLIDAY!

Seriously though, it will be nice to get away from all the distractions and to-do lists of home  and concentrate on just being a family for a few days. Plus I’m going to make Joel play boardgames with me while LV is sleeping. Perhaps I’ll even take a thousand piece puzzle? Because puzzles and inquisitive crawly mouthy mischief-making babies are the perfect match, right?

Okay, I can’t rinse this anymore, best I start getting myself sorted for the morning by going to bed. Apologies for the delirious ramble. I can’t believe you made it to the end of this one. Well done you! I will try to take some nice holiday snaps and post them soon as your reward for putting up with this nonsense. Love you.

 

I woke up today feeling very excited

One of the bonuses of running my own blog and being able to see the backend of things is having access to the list of search engine terms that bring folks to this site. Even as I type I’m having a giggle at how disappointed someone will be when they search ‘backend of things’ and wind up here.

Anyway, just for fun, today I thought I’d share some of the very best search engine terms that have led people to PBTM:

  • KFC zinger double down calories
  • Jane Yee depression
  • How big will I look at 28 weeks bump
  • Baking bun in an oven
  • How to tell if your female rat is pregnant
  • Human inside me
  • What happened to Jane Yee
  • Girl falling off cliff
  • What is a pbtm
  • Dog bed duvet
  • Cats + scratching furniture + instant coffee
  • Cancer society TV ad girl
  • I woke up today feeling very excited

And my favourite:

  • Jane Yee fat

Four times that particular search has led people to my blog! Which means, in all likelihood, there are four people out there who want to see a photo of me looking fat.

I think it’s interesting to note that aside from searches including various combinations of the words ‘Jane’, ‘Yee’, ‘picnic’ and ‘motorway,’ by far the most searched topics that have led people to my blog are Lana Del Rey’s lips and the curtain outfits from the Sound of Music.

I feel bad that I’m not able to shed any light on how to tell if your female rat is pregnant and that I haven’t posted a tutorial on bun baking. I hope those guys found solutions to their problems eventually. I wonder if they, along with the guy/gal who stumbled upon this blog while trying to buy dog bed duvets, ended up sticking around and perhaps even coming back for more?

Which begs the question… how did YOU end up here?

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