Comments for Picnic By The Motorway

Comment on Oh the guilt! by Cyberaxx

Cyberaxx — Wed, 30 May 2012 12:35:20 +0000

I believe a lot of people treat a “birth plan” as a set of instructions for how their child is going to be born.
To me a birth plan was a set of expectations of the outcomes for each concievable scenario (incuding c-sections). My wife and I went through the likely scenarios (i.e. what date induction becomes necessary, options on pain relief if an epidural was too risky because of the blood thinners, caesarians under local or general, etc) and while we didn’t have a lot of control over those situations at least we knew what should be happening and what our duties would be.
However once the words “emergency caeserian” are uttered then you (as a parent) have zero control over the birth.
Now excuse me for being blunt but the simple fact is that Victor would have died if they went through a vaginal delivery and quite possibly so would you. Sorry if that was harsh but it is just that simple.

Comment on Oh the guilt! by certified

certified — Sun, 27 May 2012 03:25:49 +0000

Many a person has says that until the contractions kick in and they really know what they are comparing!

Comment on Oh the guilt! by dragonzflame

dragonzflame — Sat, 26 May 2012 03:23:16 +0000

Cute! Must admit, I’m more one for puppies and kittens than human babies, but yours looks lovely

I’ve never got this whole ‘birth plan’ thing. I’ve heard people talk about it, but it seems like there are so many variables on the day that can’t be planned, it’s like it sets you up for disappointment. Really, the only thing that matters is that you both come out of it happy and healthy.

Not sure about epidurals though, I think I’d take the contractions over a needle in my back.

Comment on Introducing… by Jane

Jane — Fri, 25 May 2012 23:42:02 +0000

Everyone, thank you so much for your lovely messages!!

Comment on Oh the guilt! by Ali

Ali — Fri, 25 May 2012 09:21:13 +0000

Oh he is so tiny and squishy and perfect.

Comment on Oh the guilt! by TK

TK — Fri, 25 May 2012 08:27:39 +0000

My eldest was an emergency sunroof too. But 2 years later I had a normal delivery of my 2nd son. Those feelings of guilt do fade away, promise it just takes time.

We all feel guilty about everything to do with our babies/children. It’s only natural. Try not to worry yourself, we all o the best we can, and your natural instincts are right. You two are Vic’s parents, you know best.

Comment on Oh the guilt! by Phoebe1

Phoebe1 — Fri, 25 May 2012 08:03:46 +0000

Your beautiful boy is the loveliest wee human I have seen in a long time. Have to echo what Brian Frances said about unicyle and pelicans, you can plan all you want but he is the one who decides when he is coming to stay and the how is not plan-able either
My son was born in a scenario too, yes thank god for epidural and specialist. Shell shocked is a good description. But I would never ever be without him doting mother that I still am after all these years

I just love the photos of Vic, al of them and especially the one of you and him, you are glowing! Tedddy is staunchly on guard….or is it a monkey?

Comment on Oh the guilt! by jessicapea

jessicapea — Fri, 25 May 2012 06:09:32 +0000

I hear you on the birth and you are entirely allowed to feel disappointed. Heck I am still really disappointed about mine 15months on. And I know you can focus on your healthy baby and feel lucky, because we truly are, but that doesn’t take away the fact that you missed out on the birth most of us hope to have and a defining experience for many mothers. If its any consolation it does get better, you own it more with time and if you can’t say you gave birth yet start by using the phrase when Vic was born. I found that helped me to stop telling people I’d just met that I’d had a section (which then avoided all the why? Oh… Insert unsolicited advice about VBACs) .

You totally don’t get how hard it’s actually going to be eh? Well I didn’t anyway! I remember feeling realy shell shocked for the first few weeks.

Oh and he is beautiful, I love the first pic – you look amazing and so happy.

Comment on Oh the guilt! by Brian Frances

Brian Frances — Fri, 25 May 2012 05:03:08 +0000

Unfortunately, guilt is one of the key aspects of parenthood. You’ll learn to work around it And yes, you guys produced a GORGEOUS baby: even if he had come out on a unicycle while juggling pelicans.

Comment on Oh the guilt! by octopusgrrl

octopusgrrl — Fri, 25 May 2012 02:34:07 +0000

oh Jane, your birth experience sounds like a carbon copy of mine – Dali had to be “surgically removed” when it was discovered that he was trying to get out forehead first and could not be turned, even by Australasia’s specialist in turning babies. I know I can’t really help you with your feelings about the experience, everyone deals with it differently, but if it helps any, I always tried to focus on the most important point: I had a healthy beautiful baby, and I nearly didn’t. I was so lucky, I was in a hospital with capable experts on hand who helped me give birth to my son. In the greater scheme of things, my loss of a gentle “natural” water birth experience fades into the background I hope you’re healing up well, getting rest where you can and taking painkillers if you need them – be kind to yourself!